“All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’;
anything beyond this comes from the evil one. “
Matthew 5:37
Perhaps the hardest word to say as a Christian is “No”. We are afraid the other person won’t like us anymore or that we’ll hurt their feelings. If we do muster up enough courage to say “No” we are immediately flanked with guilt. After all, it isn’t the “Christian” thing to do, right?
The difficulty is that every time we say “Yes” and don’t mean it we’re lying to the other person and betraying ourselves – and possibly even sacrificing time with our family. Living a life trying to always please people inevitably leads to burn-out, anger and resentment towards others.
So how can we say “No” and feel confident about ourselves at the same time? First, if someone asks you to do something and you find yourself needing to say “No”, don’t allow guilt to push you into making an instant decision you’ll regret later. Tell the other person you’ll get back to them – and then follow up later.
Next, really consider whether or not it’s something you want to do or even more importantly something God wants you to do. One of the devils greatest tricks is to get you to overfill your schedule so you don’t have time to do the things you need to do. I often hear women say they’re too busy to pray or read the Bible, however, building a relationship with God needs to be our highest priority if life; it is in His presence that we find strength, joy, peace, and hope for our day. Your marriage and family should be next in line. So pray about whether or not you should do whatever it is you’re being asked to do.
If you are scared to say “No” understand that it may take time for you to get comfortable with declining someone when you’re so used to saying “Yes” all the time. It is not rude, nor are you obligated to give anyone a long explanation for your decision. Matter-of-fact, Matthew 5:37 says, “All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.
God takes an oath seriously and that’s exactly what it is when you agree to do something for someone else. That is why we need to seriously consider the honesty of our response and our ability to carry through, but also whether or not it’s God’s will. We are not our own; we belong to the One who bought us for a price, and our time also belongs to Him. So next time you’re asked to do something to save someone else time, stop and consider whether or not it’s something that will encroach on yours.
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