“No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other,
or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other.”
Matthew 6:24
When I got saved I lost a lot of friends who didn’t want to be associated with a “Jesus Freak”. Still, a couple of friends stuck around for the ride; mostly I think to see if the Christian-phase would wear off. One friend that remained was a guy I’ll call Stephen. Like me, he was a musician and songwriter and we had spent a lot of time writing music together. He was very talented and together we wrote some great songs.
When I told Stephen I had gotten “saved” he laughed. Still, he didn’t shy away from writing with me, nor did he change his language or behavior to accommodate my new faith in God. You see, although Stephen had a long-distance relationship, he flirted with me excessively. Apart from that, he cursed like a sailor. As an unbeliever, when he’d flirt with me, I give it right back at him and we’d banter back-and-forth for several minutes. Now that I was a believer, I got convicted when I flirted with him, so I tried to stop – but it was literally impossible. I’d only been a believer for a short time and I wasn’t strong enough in the Lord to stand against a behavior I’d been participating in for years. Aside from that, Stephen really fed my ego by flirting with me. What was a good Christian girl to do?
Sometimes, after we become a believer, we have to take an inventory of our friends and family members whose behavior has the effect of controlling ours. If you act different in front of certain people than you do when you’re in church or if Jesus was standing next to you, then you clearly see my point. Of course the Holy Spirit can give you strength to overcome such temptations, but there’s no reason to throw yourself under the bus of temptation.
As a new Christian I had to learn the practice of “detachment”, that is, separating myself from those who threatened the validity and purity of my walk in Christ. With Stephen, as much as I enjoyed his flirting and songwriting ability, it meant I had to bring an end to the relationship. He was too much of a temptation to me and I found myself acting more and more in my flesh when I was around him. When I went to the Bible to see what I should do when faced with temptation, it said, “Flee from sexual immorality” (1 Co 6:18).
In some cases, it doesn’t mean that you have to completely bring an end to your relationship like I did. It may just mean you pray for them and limit the amount of time you do spend with them. For others, you may have to “detach” for a season until you are strong enough in Christ to stand up to the temptation and not feed into it. No matter what you do, you can’t have one foot in the world and the other in Christ. God is a jealous God and will not stand for His children to be partially committed. He wants all of you and won’t settle for less.
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ReplyDeleteThanks for your blog on detachment. I've had to let go of a couple of people in my life in years past. It was painful but the right thing to do.
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